Posted in Humor, Uncategorized

Thadi issues.

So, a funny thing happened. I met a foreign national yesterday. God bless his poor soul, out of the all the normal English speaking Indians, he bumped into me. I had no clue that it was just his first day here, when he asked for a little guidance.
After I had informed him of the basics, he asked me a question so difficult that I was stumped.

“What is this?” He asked, after pointing at a thadi. “I’ve seen this everywhere!”

Empty and small inverted oil drums around a makeshift stove, with tea boiling over it, they even seemed to offer snacks with the tea.
I couldn’t help myself then.

“This? Hey, this is a national chain of roadside cafés, they’re meant to provide the visitors authentic rural experience even in an urban environment! They’re way cheaper and their food and drinks are super fresh. They even endorse the open kitchen philosophy, see, we can see their head chef as he cooks! They even take great care each morning, getting ready to look like that.”

You can say that he was giddy with excitement and we ended up sitting on the drums; sipping tea, eating toast and talking about Trump, though he wasn’t an American.

And sometime after, the good thadi chef even provided with a complimentary Samosa (Indian Patties).

Needless to say, the proud Indian chef didn’t accept money from us.

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Posted in Uncategorized

The Messiah week.

So it’s the Valentine’s week again. Or as it is known in India as, the Social messiah reinstated week.

I’m reminiscing here a few instances where I have felt quite humiliated on being a twenty first century girl. Here it goes.

I was sitting in a car with my boyfriend, soon to be fiancé actually. We were having coffee after a long day at our individual work places and this was our catching-up time. And what could two individuals, who are desperately in love with not one’s body, but soul do? They talk.

That’s what we were doing. Holding hands, drinking coffee out of travel mugs and talking.

All of a sudden, two guys in their thirties, well clothed and well financed, judging from their bikes, came and stopped right in front of our car. We were confused as to why weren’t they turning their lights off; when all of a sudden, my partner let out a curse and put the car in reverse. They had thrown a huge brick, right at our windshield.

The brick had narrowly missed it and after we drove away, real fast let me tell you, we started the inspection. After kilometers of drive back to our home, with a dent in our car and coffee all over our expensive suits, we felt safe enough to recount our experience to our parents.

They were furious, informing us that it was illegal in any state or condition for them to attack us. That’s an attempt to murder charge, right there. They could’ve broken the shield and endangered our lives. I think the social messiahs are kind of lacking in their studies, choosing to be so reckless.

We got married a few years later, not celebrating this Messiah week as we began calling it.The very year we got married, my best friend decided that he should also get married and called me, seeking my expertise in planning a proposal for his girlfriend.

We planned the entire thing and after purchasing everything, from a bouquet to the ring, we called her. While waiting for her to arrive, we decided to sit by the stairs in the mall. I cannot tell how strange it was then, when a few men, adorned in the white kurta’s and holding huge sticks came to us and pulled my friend up. They began pushing everyone away from their girls, without thinking about their relationships. It was a chaos that day, making me feel unsafe when a few of these social messiahs came close to me, leering as he pretended to be going the God’s work. My friend had to show them my ring and pretend as if we’re married to make them leave us alone.

We could marry someone, have friends as good as brothers but some people just don’t stop bothering or judging us.

The Messiah week has made sure that I stay inside for at least 7 days and to host parties at my place if I want to stay sane, yet social at the same time.

Let’s face it guys, no God or country has said that we cannot express love. You people, acting as vigilante’s, claiming to uphold the society’s reputation are the worst ones out there. You leer at other people’s wives but don’t look at your own. You say you’re religious, but you act as monsters, forgetting about your own Lord Krishna.

You attack people, sometimes even manage to hurt them, yet pretend to be doing good for the society? What is society actually? Who makes it? We do. And if a smaller portion is spoiling the way we live, shouldn’t we do something about it? Like imprisoning you for an attempt to murder ?

I’m going to get a liscenced gun or a stick of my own, if that keeps me safe while celebrating the week of love with my husband without it getting turned into the Messiah week.

I swear, at the rate this is going, when my daughter grows up and decides to date someone, I’ll have to set up a damn cafe in my own house to keep her safe when she goes on dates.